[dropcap]W[/dropcap]ell thank you too fellow daddy blogger Bruce from Big Family, Little Income for the nomination to disclose 5 things that you never knew about me…

I don’t normally write too much about me on the blog, unlike Bruce who bears nearly all… mostly in a good way. Apart from that time when him and some mates went to…. Oh, I don’t think he wants that one told on the internet!

If you’ve never been here to the blog before than you’re most welcome and feel free to kick back, look around, post a comment or 2, share anything that you think might be funny or helpful with your friends and do let me know if there’s anything that you don’t like. Please use the contact me page for that one.

Back to the 5 questions. I was trying to kill a bit of time their so I could think of 5 things that you may not know about me… Most of you probably know that I got married to Fast Lane Mum this year on Valentines day. Ahhh. And that 

I have searched deep into the depths of my soul, brain and underwear drawer for 5 things and I think i’ve just about managed.

1) When I was about 6 we were in class and the teacher was telling us all about something that was very interesting, so much so that my mind began to wander. Come on, it felt like she had been crapping on for about an hour, when in reality was probably only 5 minutes… Suddenly I had this overwhelming urge, to bite the kid who was sat just in front of me. I have no idea where it came from, as i’d never done anything like that before, or since for the record. Ok, maybe the odd nibble, but Stephen was going to get it and get it he did, right on top of his left shoulder. I didn’t think about the repercussions at the time as I thought it might not hurt and he’d just hit me or bite me back, in some sort of vampire style frenzy. He didn’t. He screamed… I got sent to see someone more senior and he got all the attention. I played Xylophone in the school play after that in an attempt to make myself more popular. The end.

Louis Suarez Bite

2)  My dad has always had his own garage, the sort of garage that repairs cars when they get smashed-up. One day had a spare hour or two and also had an old Austin 1100 car in the corner (See pic below) so, he taught me to drive. I was 11.

I give you the Awesome Austin/Morris 1100
I give you the Awesome Austin/Morris 1100

3) I played bass in a band after only 10 weeks practice. It involved alcohol both before, during and after. True story.

That's me on the right :)
That’s me on the right :)

 4) The Clean Sheet – Not the bed sheets, in the footballing sense. When I went on football tour to Germany as a 14yr old I shared goalkeeping duties with the boy from the younger age group in the 11-a-side games and then we played a 5-a-side tournament in individual teams. The opposition must have thought that they had no way of scoring past the fat kid (me) and so they targeted my younger compatriot with vigour. I never let one goal in and he let in loads.

<IMG>Fat kid in goal with big smile!</IMG> #Fail

5) Finally, I once did a backwards somersault on my Raleigh Grifter – It was in the small village and we used to ride around like we were BMX bandits, only I didn’t have a BMX at this point in time, I had the HEAVY AS LEAD Raleigh Grifter XL and it was a horror. I had it for Christmas and I wouldn’t consider myself ungrateful but… I absolutely HATED this bike. Any chance I had to potentially inflict damage on this, this thing, I gleefully did. This time we were doing big jumps up a natural ramp by the side of a tree that then, after a strip of grass about 2m wide dropped down to a stream. My turn! As fast is I could pedal this monster, I hit the ramp, pulled on the handle bars and in slow motion started to rotate backwards… I had no intention of this happening when I launched my assault at the ramp, I just wanted air! I got more than I bargained for and ended up landing the somersault, again, no idea how but then I forgot to brake and ended up, to the cheers and amazement of my peers, in the stream. 

One of my friends thought this to be a momentous enough event that he should write my mum a letter, explaining the whole event in finite detail. 

The Grifter XL - Stunt bike #NOT
The Grifter XL – Stunt bike #NOT

Who should I nominate?? Do you know any other bloggers that would be good for a laugh? I’d love some help nominating please…



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    1. Not directly Danielle but I did have 2 encounters with a thick wooden fence that left me requiring lots of stitches in my head! He was a good mate too which made me feel even worse after i’d done it. #nomnom

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